Don't try this at home -- or elsewhere

Don't try this at home -- or elsewhere

 Don't try this trick if you want to keep your driver's license.

A woman in Olofstrom, Sweden, said her mother -- a woman in her eighties -- came home from the grocery store in the wrong car.

The octogenarian did not have to hotwire the borrowed wheels. Instead, the Local reported, she got into the wrong car and, since the key was in the ignition, simply failed to realize was not in the right vehicle.

The report did not say whether she failed to notice stop signs and the like, but the daughter said the car in her mother's garage bore no resemblance whatsoever to mother's vehicle.

The car had been reported stolen by the time the daughter phoned the police, but no charges were filed. The owner of the car admitted the keys had been left in the ignition.

The report did not mention whether or not the octogenarian's driver's license was in jeopardy, but, you know ... just saying.

In Richmond, British Columbia, police advised the public to leave their so-called gunbrellas at home.

What is a gunbrella, you ask. Well, it's an umbrella that -- oh, this is so funny; you're going to love this -- resembles a rifle. What a gag, right?

OK, nobody has died in a hail of gunfire for carrying a gunbrella as far as we know, but CBC News reported that police did not enjoy the humor behind the idea.

"If it appeared that he was actually shouldering the rifle -- if our officers believed he was about to fire -- I mean, our officers would have no choice," said Richmond Royal Canadian Mounted Police Sgt. Sherrdean Turley.

OK, if police are going to be that touchy, it is probably best to also leave any weaponry-mimicking briefcases and sidearm cellphones at home, too.

Now how many times do we have to go over this in Burglary School? The getting away fast part is just as important as the breaking into the place part. Got that?

Yes, every year there's a few Burglary School graduates who seem to forget the getaway part.

For example, in Naples, Italy, don't try using taxicabs as getaway vehicles.

Police said a man robbed two pharmacies and made his escape in a taxi.

ANSA reported that the man, Antonio Baldassarre told clerks at the pharmacies he was the son of a mafia boss and he was armed.

He then took off with $269 of ill-gotten cash and got away in a taxi.

The cab driver, apparently did not know his passenger had just committed armed robbery.

At least in Juan De Acosta, Colombia, they plan these things.

And these burglars can't really be held accountable if their getaway vehicle started braying, which happened to alert the police.

That's right, three men who robbed a convenience store tried to get away on a donkey, but the donkey's braying was so loud, they had to abandon the burro and make their getaway on foot, the police said.

Hey, any plan can go wrong, right?

The Daily Telegraph reported police said the donkey had been stolen 12 hours earlier. So, these guys had planned ahead.

Late at night they burgled a convenience store, but when their getaway failed, they also had to abandon their loot, which consisted of oil, rice, tuna, sardines and rum.

The donkey, 10-year-old Xavi, was returned to its owner, police said